Trust
Eight months ago, that was the word I chose for OneWord2011. When Alece put out the idea at the beginning of the year, that was the first word that came to my mind. Little did I know what I was getting myself into.
When I picked the word Trust, I’m pretty sure God rolled out the red carpet right down to a WWE wrestling ring full of sweaty, brightly colored mask-wearing situations that would teach me to trust in Him – probably with the help of an RKO or Last Ride. (If you’ve never followed wrestling, these references will be lost on you, kinda like they were on me
) I guess that’s what happens when you ask God to help you work on your trust. I should have picked something a lot simpler, like working on my ability to not proofread through worship while I’m at church.
So far this year, I’ve had:
- A major job switch
- My heart scrambled
- My heart scrambled again
- And I just volunteered to run a ministry that I can’t get any leaders to agree to help me with.
Do you see anything here that says “You’re gonna have to trust Me on this.”? Yeah, I thought so too. It may not sound like a lot, but trust me, some days it feels like plenty. All this at the same time that I know God has placed it on my heart to do something that helps people. Possibly not just in a “one weekend a month, two weeks a year” kind of way. More like an “here’s what you get to do every day kind of way.” The problem is that He hasn’t told me what that is or what it even looks like at this point. So I’m struggling to trust that God has a plan for me and even though I can’t see what it is, I have to trust that He’s got it under control.
I’m a big fan of John Eldredge. I read Waking the Dead earlier this year, and it talked about trusting in the wildness of God. In the Chronicles of Narnia, C.S. Lewis, when writing about Aslan, refers to him in this way:
He may not be safe, but He is good.
I have realized this year that I don’t want a God who’s safe. I don’t want to live a life where I look back when I’m 80 and realize I’ve lived a “safe” life. I want a God who is dangerous, never resting, always standing on the edge. Jesus would not have been killed if he was safe. The pharisees wouldn’t have been worried about a “safe” guy. All I need to trust in is that God is good. Yes, I realize that living a dangerous life in the footsteps of my Creator means that I’m going to get hurt, bloodied, and bruised. I’m going to be attacked by satan (always little “s”, don’t give him the satisfaction of capitalization) because I am dangerous, and it took me until this year to realize what James meant when he said
Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds… James 1:2
At the end of my life, when I look back over what I’ve done, I want to be able to say that I lived bravely, loved fearlessly, and attacked relentlessly the calling that I was given. And that is something I wouldn’t be able to say with a “safe” God and a lack of trust. I have to trust in a God that is above all, good. So if this is God’s way of saying I have to rely on His goodness, then that’s what I need to be learning.
He may not be safe, but He is good.


season in life. A tough thing to swallow, that’s for sure, but very true.




